It's Been Too Long

Hey.

So I'm writing a new entry. Even though I've been feeling like my online blog presence is very random, chaotic, unfocused, etc. Like, what real purpose have my blogs served me, and other people? My blogs have pretty much been online diaries, and I do feel self-conscious about that. Like, part of me feels like my blogs should be different, and have more of an appeal to people. But whatevs. For some reason, I always feel better after I have checked in via a blog. So that's what I'ma do.

It's been a hot minute.

I've been working at a children's museum part time (4 days per week). It's...interesting. I do have fun with the children, but office politics can get to me sometimes. I guess that's anywhere.

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I will be moving to Rockaway Beach, Queens rather soon. All of my things have been moved out of my Bed Stuy apartment; about half are in the new Queens apartment and the other half are being stationed at my parent's. I've been sleeping on my parent's couch this past week, and tomorrow they will help me transport the last of my stuff to Queens. (BTW, I have way too much stuff.) I'm kind of scared to move there because I think I might get really, really lonely, being so far from so many people that I know and love. Luckily, I am a traveler so I literally will go anywhere if there is public transportation. I will definitely visit friends and go out. But will they visit me?? I don't know. :( On the flip side, the neighborhood is AMAZING. There's a library basically on my block, and the beach is 3 blocks away. The ocean and I will definitely get aquainted this summer. It's also much cheaper than my formerly $900/month 1 br apartment in Brooklyn. It's only one room with a small refrigerator and a stove, but the shared bathroom is very clean and the house is really nice. Remind me to buy flip flops for the shower, DuBois Hall style (my old college dorm).

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I want to be one of those girls who are always fabulously fly. And shit.

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My love life has been lackluster. But I've also been more focused on not being broke than on dating. I'm also still a shy person. I don't know how that's going to work out for me in the proverbial end. But Susan Piver said to approach life from a "how can I love?" standpoint as opposed to a "who can love me?" standpoint.

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I've developed some sort of weird congestion yesterday. I know it's from eating all sorts of crap with reckless abandon, and all these crazy weather changes here in NYC. I immediately went on a 100% vegan tea and fruit juice regimen to help flush out the toxicity, and I'm feeling a little better. However, I don't think I will be vegan again when I get well. I LOVE fish (and cheese!), and I was even eating some chicken here and there before I got sick. When I eat a vegan diet, I don't feel emotionally fulfilled. That might be addiction to non-vegan foods, but I suspect that it also has to do with my vata body temperament. But I do believe that consuming a 50-75% vegan diet (with a high percentage of raw fruits and veggies via salads and smoothies) is probably going to be the best for me, for general maintenance of my body's systems. And going easy on the cheese, though I love it so. Though Gary Null, who always delivers the latest health and nutrition news, would say I should be fully vegan.

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I've been feeling uncreative and unmeditative. I've been falling off my schedule of sleeping early, rising early, and getting lots of shit done. But I want to change this.