Learnings from the Redwood Forest

Confession: I have spent the last few hours trying to encapsulate my experience at Leveraging Privilege for Social Change YES Jam. And...I can't. I have few intelligible, connected words as to how much I grew and changed in the span of one week. The entry I kept trying to create is not coming out so I'm just gonna scratch everything. Let's be clear, the week was NOT PERFECT. It was messy and emotional, and people's biases and racism and classism and pain came out and really hurt me. My own shit came out and hurt others I'm sure. But there was also healing and connection and joy that existed side-by-side these wells of pain that sprung forth when I was triggered, or when others were triggered. (Thinking of Gibran: "Your pain is a breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.") In a highly imperfect way, we dissected class and race and gender and sexuality, and talked about how we can create communities of resistance and interdependence even in the midst of deep oppression. But I think THE most valuable thing for me was not just the TALKING about building community...but the FEELING of community that was created by 30 people willing to just TRY. Amazing, empowering, and AWESOME! And a slap in the face of capitalistic ideals that say that money, power, and greed must always trump community building and relationship to others. I didn't connect evenly with each and every participant...ALL of my walls and my blocks didn't come crashing down...but the atmosphere of LOVE and folks agreeing to hold community for one another was still SO formidable that I truly feel BLESSED to have met everybody. TRULY. I think instead of an actual point by analysis of every little scenario of the Jam, I will just list learnings I took from the Jam as they come up for me, or questions I'm still sitting with.

(P.S.--the Jam took place in a Quaker Center that was located in a Redwood Forest. I had no access to my phone or email...so I was stuck meditating with the trees. So yea. I had to sit with my shit forreal.)

In the Redwood Forest, I Learned...

1. The importance of being PRESENT: of stating what is up for you in your heart WITHOUT judging yourself so that you can be fully engaged with another person (instead of pretending to listen while being lost in your thoughts)

2. That sometimes, it's okay to not have answers or an immediate response to something someone has said...sometimes it's just the feeling of being supported or listened to that someone needs

3. Interdependence is revolutionary in a society that literally profits off of people's isolation to one another (thinking of POOR magazine's presentation)

4. Speaking from the "I" is an important, though sometimes difficult practice that prevents us from violating the boundaries or not hearing the experiences of others

5. Change work is difficult...and it hurts. But we can still be joyous at each step. And we can be focused on our inner light. And we can choose to create revolutionary communities grounded in love.

6. When we act from our CORE, we move in the world with integrity. We respect our values and our boundaries

7. When we hold community for someone else, we give them space to just "be" without feeling the need to "be" them or speak for them or even speak

8. Question I sit with: how do I remain open to love and connection in a society so fraught with fragmentation and "dog eat dog" mentalities? (Thinking of YES booklet, "No Way Out, Many Ways Forward")

K. That's it for tonight. Maybe I'll be inspired again for a different entry.